Mission Impossible in Munich

Someone call the Italian consulate because what happened to Atalanta last week should have been illegal. After a 6-1 demolition in Bergamo, Gian Piero Gasperini’s men are heading to the Allianz Arena with the same energy as a man trying to stop a tidal wave with a cocktail umbrella. The Dea usually prides itself on chaos, but the only chaos in the first leg was their defensive line resembling a Sunday League team after a long night at the pub.

Vincent Kompany has turned this Bayern side into a BAVARIAN STEAMROLLER that doesn’t just win; it deletes its opponents from the server. Currently sitting pretty in 2nd place in the Champions League table, the Germans are playing with the kind of arrogance that only comes from having a bench worth more than most mid-sized European cities. Harry Kane is probably already polishing his boots for another hat-trick, while the rest of the squad treats this second leg as a glorified cardio session.

Atalanta, meanwhile, are 15th in the league phase and look like they’ve forgotten how to defend. Their man-to-man marking system worked about as well as a chocolate teapot against Jamal Musiala’s dancing feet. They’ll talk about "pride" and "honor" in the pre-match press conference, but we all know they just want to get through the 90 minutes without conceding double digits on aggregate.

Expect Bayern to rotate, play their third-choice goalkeeper for a laugh, and still dominate. The Italians might grab a consolation goal just to make the flight home less depressing, but the outcome is as certain as a Bavarian beer festival being loud. It's not a comeback; it's a funeral with a better soundtrack.

Prediction: FC Bayern München 4-1 Atalanta BC