Chelsea’s expensive circus meets the City machine

Is there anything more predictable in modern life than Chelsea spending the GDP of a small island on teenagers only to find themselves staring at the wrong end of a 3-0 drubbing by Everton? Probably not. Tomorrow at Stamford Bridge, the Londoners welcome a Manchester City side that is currently breathing down Arsenal’s neck, though they’ve been doing more wheezing than breathing lately.

Chelsea sits 6th in the table with 48 points, and their recent form is about as stable as a house of cards in a hurricane. After being humbled by Newcastle and dismantled by Everton, Enzo Maresca is presumably spending his nights wondering why he ever left the relative sanity of the Championship. The only bright spot is Cole Palmer, who continues to be the only person at the Bridge who actually knows what a goal looks like.

Manchester City, currently 2nd with 61 points, are in a bit of a weird spot. Pep Guardiola’s men have developed a sudden and alarming addiction to draws, having dropped points against Nottingham Forest and West Ham. If they want to catch an Arsenal side that seems to have forgotten how to lose, they absolutely HAVE to win here. Erling Haaland has 22 goals this season, but even he looks human when the service from midfield is more "commuter rail" than "bullet train."

Expect Chelsea to start with high energy, mostly because they haven't realized yet that they’re playing Man City. Expect City to eventually remember they are significantly better at football and start passing the Blues into a state of existential dread. It’ll be tactical, it’ll be expensive, and it’ll probably end with Todd Boehly looking very confused in the VIP box.

Chelsea 1-3 Manchester City